Test your knowledge on Steptoe and Son

 

Hi Folks, Welcome to my Steptoe and Son Quiz.

 

It's only a bit of fun, with no prizes for the winner.

 

Unfortunately as I am not to hot on setting up web-pages you are going to have to copy and paste the answer grid to another program on your P.C. in order to type in the answers.  (i am working on this though)

 

The quiz was formed on WORD and when I took it from here back to WORD or my email page it worked fine.

 

Most of you will have arrived at this quiz via the

http://www.albertandharold.co.uk/  or  http://www.steptoe-and-son.com/ web-sites

 

PLEASE DO NOT POST YOUR ANSWERS BACK TO THESE SITES.

Feel free to place your views about this quiz on the forums and board though.

 

Copy and paste your answers to   steptoescripts@ntlworld.com   I will check them and send you back your results.

I will post each persons result back to the above Site Forums and Message boards myself in a smaller format. (If that's where you came from)

 

The quiz looks easy, but believe me it's not. Good luck.

 

Only Clue.............There is 1 LINE ONLY from each episode and I have not used any lines from the 2 Films

Opps....that also means that I have not used 7 episodes. I wonder which ones?   

GOOD LUCK

 

 

   Name                                           

 

 

 

   Email address                            

 

 

 

   Country                                       

 

 

 

   Where you found this quiz       

 

 

 

 

Question

No

Which Steptoe episode did the lines below come from?

   Add the episode number (see grid below)  in the Quiz answer box >>>

Quiz Answer

 

1

Put her down you dirty little devil

 

 

2

All be it a trifle ostentatious

 

 

3

I was hit on the head with a German hand grenade

 

 

4

2am, fell sleepily into bed

 

 

5

Dad, will you stop eating that carpet

 

 

6

you might as well have the horse sitting in the armchair and av done with it

 

 

7

I don't want to see one of yer ears coming through the letter box

 

 

8

If there had been any stuffing handy it could have been very painful

 

 

9

You'd get on the Archbishop of Canterbury's tits, you would

 

 

10

If I get any more I shall punch you straight in the throat

 

 

11

Shipwrecked off Southend

 

 

12

That's what I got a hole under my nose for, to shove food down

 

 

13

You're about as trendy as a Russian motor car

 

 

14

Alright, alright, don't knock the bleeding door down

 

 

15

If she's got hair's on her chin I'm not kissing her

 

 

16

Cor blimey, you must have done it with yer eyes shut

 

 

17

I was having a marvellous dream about Mary Pickford

 

 

18

I feel like a parrot perched up here.

 

 

19

You look worse than the skeleton

 

 

20

A right ol goon show were going to get here

 

 

21

Don't you call me brother, I'm yer Father

 

 

22

Well, all I can say is, you better find yourself some fit birds

 

 

23

You're not unclean, your filthy

 

 

24

Ol gawd, what have I put my hand in?

 

 

25

Don't think of yer future dad, think of the past

 

 

26

It's like feeding time down the vulture house

 

 

27

If you're not careful you'll be the first thing down it, alright

 

 

28

Queens Park Rangers was at home

 

 

29

If I'd have been a bit younger it could have warped me for life

 

 

30

A jailbird, a bloke on the dole and a snow clearer

 

 

31

Well there shouldn't be feathers in the gravy, surely

 

 

32

I get you out of one hole and you go and dig yourself another one

 

 

33

I even gave you the meat off me plate during the rationing

 

 

34

What are you talking about, I'm only four years older than Cary Grant

 

 

35

Let me inform you mush, if there's any stuffing to be done, you're going to be the first in line

 

 

36

You look like an out of work actor

 

 

37

10 years old and I already had a touch of the Farmer Giles

 

 

38

Tee cups from the counter, That's all you got

 

 

39

My lungs must be like a pair of lace curtains

 

 

40

What's that old boot grizzling about?

 

 

41

Oh now now Sonny Jim, that's no way to speak about your future Mummy

 

 

42

He's going to set up two chemi-karzies in the yard

 

 

43

And if I gets the chance I shall whoop it up em again, alright

 

 

44

I feel like a bleeding penguin in this suit 

 

 

45

You were heavier than me when you was eleven

 

 

46

Save six of these labels for a record of Freddy and the Dreamers

 

 

47

Steptoe the kleptoe they're calling you down the market

 

 

48

.. Ladies from hell the Jerry's used to call em

 

 

49

One word out of place and she'd get a gas bracket wrapped round her head

 

 

50

You have put the milk in first again haven't you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Episode

No

Episode Title's below.

 <<<<<(add the episode Number to the above Grid)

Transmission Date

 

1

The Offer

1/5/1962

 

2

The Bird

6/14/1962

 

3

The Piano

6/21/1962

 

4

The Economist

6/28/1962

 

5

The Diploma

7/5/1962

 

6

The Holiday

7/12/1962

 

7

The Bath

1/3/1963

 

8

Wallah-Wallah Catsmeat

1/10/1963

 

9

The Stepmother

1/17/1963

 

10

Sixty-Five Today

1/24/1963

 

11

A Musical Evening

1/31/1963

 

12

Full House

2/7/1963

 

13

Is That Your Horse Outside?

2/14/1963

 

14

Homes Fit For Heroes

1/7/1964

 

15

The Wooden Overcoats

1/14/1964

 

16

The Lead Man Cometh

1/21/1964

 

17

Steptoe a La Cart

1/28/1964

 

18

Sunday For Seven Days

2/4/1964

 

19

The Bonds That Bind Us

2/11/1964

 

20

The Lodger

2/18/1964

 

21

And Afterwards At

10/4/1965

 

22

Crossed Swords

10/11/1965

 

23

Those Magnificent Men and Their Heating Machines

10/18/1965

 

24

Siege of Steptoe Street

10/25/1965

 

25

A Box in Town

11/1/1965

 

26

My Old Man's A Tory

11/8/1965

 

27

Pilgrim's Progress

11/15/1965

 

28

A Death In the Family

3/6/1970

 

29

A Winter's Tale

3/13/1970

 

30

Any Old Iron?

3/20/1970

 

31

Steptoe and Son - and Son!

3/27/1970

 

32

The Colour Problem

4/3/1970

 

33

T.B. or not T.B.?

4/10/1970

 

34

Men of Property

4/17/1970

 

35

Robbery with Violence

11/2/1970

 

36

Come Dancing

11/9/1970

 

37

Two's Company

11/16/1970

 

38

Tea for Two

11/23/1970

 

39

Without Prejudice

11/30/1970

 

40

Pot Black

12/7/1970

 

41

The Three Feathers

12/14/1970

 

42

Cuckoo in the Nest

12/20/1970

 

43

Men of Letters

2/21/1972

 

44

A Star is Born

2/28/1972

 

45

Oh, What a Beautiful Mourning

3/6/1972

 

46

Live Now, P.A.Y.E Later

3/13/1972

 

47

Loathe Story

3/20/1972

 

48

Divided We Stand

3/27/1972

 

49

The Desperate Hours

4/3/1972

 

50

Back in Fashion

9/4/1974

 

51

Porn Yesterday

9/11/1974

 

52

And So To Bed

9/18/1974

 

53

The Seven Steptoerai

9/25/1974

 

54

Upstairs, Downstairs, Upstairs, Downstairs

10/3/1974

 

55

Seance in a Wet Rag and Bone Yard

10/10/1974

 

 56

Christmas Special 1973

(The Party)

12/24/1973

 

 57

Christmas Special 1974 (A Perfect Christmas)

12/26/1974